?

Log in

life chaotic (+1 respect)

Okay, so, life. I had my meeting with Suzanne... was both worse than and not as bad as I expected. Tracy thinks I'm behind on school work and I've been taking off days/being late to try to play catch up, and not talking to her about it. Which is far from the case. So, not quite what I expected, but at least she doesn't (exactly) think I'm a huge slacker. On the other hand, Suzanne warned me to expect Tracy to look in on me. Didn't happen this week between MSAs and Tracy having jury duty, but apparently I can expect her to pop in and see if I'm doing everything properly. I mean, I don't have the lesson plan book I'm supposed to, but aside from that... I do what I'm supposed to, so it should be okay.

I gained a ton of respect for Tracy at the seminar today. She let the class rant for an hour about how unreasonable and condescending our reading assessment professor is at the university and gave us advice on how to handle it. Very frank, helpful advice. And she demonstrated yet again how knowledgeable she is about classroom management. She has a treasure trove of random examples/experiences I never in a million years would have imagined. I'll be honest; I let my view of her as a supervisor color my view of her as a teacher. She's a fantastic teacher. She's not even a bad supervisor, she just has certain ways about her that don't mesh with my style, for lack of a better description.

Life is hectic. Danny is amazing through all of it, as I was practically bragging to Katie today. He drove to Whetstone during rush hour yesterday to fix my random flat tire, and drove my car for me today to get it fixed while I was at my internship. The thing with Morgan was hard, but I really think it made our relationship even stronger in the end. I think we both appreciate what we have more. I love the hell out of that man, and he's always showing the ways he cares about me.

My classmates are in a panic over our reading assessment class with Brie; I've had her before and she's crazy and condescending, but I'm making a high A in her class (I've only lost half a participation point overall so far, everything else has perfect marks) and although the upcoming workload seems overwhelming, I know I'll get through it like I always do. I did volunteer to speak to her with a couple other students about our concerns though--based on the advice Tracy gave. Some really great ideas. Approach it as the needs we have in order to get out of her course what we know she wants us to get out of it, like better clarification of expectations on assignments, examples of assignments before they're due instead of after people have fucked them up, and less of a workload. I told Lauren, who's ring-leading this confrontation, that I don't want her to feel we're ganging up on her, so I don't have to come, but if they want the support I'm there.

I also told Katie I'd look over her papers before she submits them if she likes. She's not a writer the way I am, which makes it hard for her. Brie, from what we can tell, is super-biased against imperfect grammar and writing mechanics, so I'm thinking if I can fine-tune Katie's papers she can get better marks.

I have some great behavior incentive stuff to try when I get the chance. I'm thinking I'll order the mailbox thing I want for the classroom, too, even though it's really more expensive than I want to pay for right now.

Big plans for SynTru--another example of money I shouldn't spend but really want to. Assirra has offered to add IP.Blog, and I want IP.Content too. Each is $50. I think they could really work wonders on the site... meh. We'll see how that pans out. Right now we're kind of surveying member opinions to see how popular they'd be if added. Assirra and Zap have worked wonders with SynTru since I haven't had time for it anymore. I'm constantly amazed by their dedication.

Speaking of, I have a piece of feedback due today. I think I'll go do that now.

oh crap

Got an email from Suzanne (my supervisor at my internship) saying some things came up at the supervisor's meeting that she needs to touch base with Alice and me on. Seeing as it's just the two of us, I'm thinking it has to do with me being a slacker and Tracy (lead supervisor or whatever) knowing it. I don't think she likes me much because last semester I skipped one of her classes without emailing an excuse, and this semester I skipped the first after school seminar again without an excuse, and Monday she caught me getting to school late. It's the only time I've been late this semester, but of course that's the time she catches me. I have a valid excuse: I was sick all last week (still have the cough) and even had to miss Friday, though I emailed her for that, so I can just blame being sick. I did email Alice to let her know I'd be late, I just didn't email Tracy or Suzanne.

If that's the case, at least we'll be talking to Suzanne and not Tracy. I'm not fond of that woman, and Suzanne is much nicer and more reasonable. Blah.

Other than that, the internship is going well. I've had less trouble with getting up early all the time than I anticipated, though I do always push it until the last possible second before getting out of bed. I've taken over reading, and am in the process of fully taking over science and math. Need to do some planning for that after this, actually. We're starting cells and heredity in science, and math is statistics. I'm going to borrow one of Danny's tape measures and have the kids graph the class heights and find the measures of central tendency for the data.

Have not been writing. Finished a chapter of a Zelda fanfic, but nothing other than that. Rargh. But I mean, I'm busy. A lot. So I guess it's not so bad an idea to not force writing where it doesn't want to come.

I wish my cough would go away...

good (busy) times

Hope everyone had a good Valentine's Day :D Danny and I celebrated Saturday. Just stayed in with alcohol, video games, Magic: the Gathering, and movies.

I've made lame money the last few shifts at work. Here's hoping the weekend will be better, because we'll need the money. Haven't heard back from Baka, our real estate agent, in a few days. Last we heard, the bank's figuring out the amount left due on the loan for the place so they can come back with a counter offer. I hope they get to it very soon. We need to get the heck out of this place.

School is hectic. Well, life in general. Internship 8-4 Monday through Friday, with an hour-long commute--though I do tend to leave around 3 fairly often to get to work/uni class/mandatory seminars. Three days a week at Hard Times--generally Monday and Friday evening, plus either Saturday or Sunday. Tuesday evening class at the university. Tutoring Shane on Wednesday. And a seminar about every other week on Thursday in a random location.

Teaching is good. I vastly prefer math and reading to science or social studies. I look at science and I'm just kind of like... "What am I going to do, exactly?" There's so much to choose from, but so little time to teach it. I'm taking over science now (slowly), so it's... blah. But reading is really good. It's so freeform you can do almost anything. And the kids are really taking to their writing journals. They love getting feedback.

I had to leave early today for my IUD appointment. I am the proud owner of a Mirena IUD that cramped like a bitch for the first couple hours. It wasn't super painful, just like really heavy duty menstrual cramps. But really gross since they had me come in and get it done on my period; apparently it hurts less then. I guess it's nice of them to consider my pain over their probable preference to not have to stick their hands in a bleeding vagina. For the next week I have to use backup protection, but then I'm good for five years. What what.

Also, I'm getting published. Alt Hist picked up Death in Theatre for its second issue. It's a new magazine, but it's been reviewed by Locus, among others, so it's getting good press. So that's looking up. Not that I've been writing. I'm really busy lately and feel pretty drained, and I'd rather not write unless I really feel like it because forcing myself to in the midst of all my other crap would just not be pleasant.

And I thought I did terribly on my Praxis II tests for Middle School Math and English, but I passed with flying colors. So I'll be qualified to teach middle school, either math or English--in theory at least. I'll be applying everywhere in Montgomery County (and possibly Howard too... or maybe Anne Arundel... depends on where we're living and such...) and then weeding through my options to figure out what I want to do. Because I really don't have any desire to teach science or social studies, but I want to teach math AND reading, so... blah. Makes a choice between middle and elementary school complicated.

Guess that's it for now? I mean, I've been reading--the Uglies series by Scott Westerfeld and now I'm working on the Mortal Instruments series by Cassandra Clare--but eh. That's it. Overall life's good, just hectic and somewhat stressful.

Oh wait! Mirage Games accepted my response to the first work order they sent me and sent me confirmation of the credits earned, but I haven't heard about anything else forthcoming. So that's kind of sad.

snowy snow

So I fail at updating, but meh.

The holidays were fun. I spent them with Danny and his family, as usual. We both got lots of good stuff, but his parents always take way better care of us than we deserve. Danny actually went into a bookstore to get my gifts, which is like a present in itself.

New Years Eve we spent in Virginia with Aaron, Matt, and Claire. It was Aaron's birthday, too, so double the celebration. Morgan was there, but she's completely different... she was dressed very nicely, if maybe a little skankily, and flirting with two guys most of the night, dirty dancing with another, who subsequently took her home. Matt knew the guy apparently; he got a text something like this: "Dude I'm with this chick Morgan, she's so drunk, I'm getting lucky tonight." I didn't see it, but Danny did and told me afterward. I think Danny tried to avoid thinking about it. It's hard for him to see her like that when he wants to take care of her. I asked him, if they were still close friends, what he would say to her. And he said he wouldn't have let her get this far. (How he would stop her is beyond me, but eh.)

New Years Day, Danny and his dad went to a Redskins game (which made everybody else go D: but his dad had been gunning for them to go to a game together all season so I found it hard to be more than disappointed) while I stayed home and had dinner with Sue and her side of the family. Which mostly consisted of old people talk.

Over the holiday season, I went on a lottery playing streak. Very disappointing, haha. I was relieved when the jackpot finally broke (it got pretty high). But Danny and I did have fun imagining what we would do with that much money.

We're looking for condos because the living situation here is just... going downhill. Roy insists on raising the rent for real and says if we don't pay the new amount next month he'll keep us out of the house with a shotgun until we pay. Someone broke my glasses (or at the VERY least found them on the floor broken) and didn't own up to it, so now I have to wear contacts all the time. Everything's a mess basically.

I was looking through Danny's email to find the VA approval letter he got for our home loan once we find a condo we want, and found two emails he sent himself in his notes back in October: Morgan's number in one (around the time he insisted on deleting it from his phone) and a half-drugged/asleep text she sent him around that same time. I can't really be mad because that's all over now, but at the same time, it's another thing he kept from me. Stupid, stupid man. Sometimes I wonder if I ever got the full story out of him. And if he'll ever stop keeping things from me "to protect me" or because I "really don't need to know". What a jerk.

i miss thoughtful conversation

Finished rereading the Hunger Games series last night. God, but it's epic. For all that I think the author's something of a bitch, she's still a genius. Spent a while looking for good quote icons from the books and found some really cute ones.

But I really miss having friends to talk to who have read and adored the same books I have. I don't think it's really happened since Harry Potter. I mean, Danny read the first two Hunger Games books and I'm trying to pressure him into getting around to the third. But it's not even close to the same. He doesn't like to really, deeply think about stories the way I do, and he gets annoyed when I "overanalyze."

I'll put up a thread at SynTru basically begging for discussion of some of my favorite books, see how that goes.

I need to write. -sigh- I determined that, at the moment, I don't really care about Grey and Kayden the way I do about Peeta and Katniss and some other characters I've truly loved from my favorite stories, which may contribute to why I've been feeling so uninspired about them. I think I need to get to know them better.

And my Secret Santa present is due soon. Blah.

ew.

I learned today at my GYN appointment that a colposcopy involves putting vinegar... up there... and watching how the body reacts. Talk about strangely gross. However, my exam turned up normal, so I just have to come back in a year and get a direct HPV exam instead of a normal PAP. Assuming that comes back negative, I'll be all clear. If not, it'll just mean another colposcopy.

I'm going to smell like vinegar all day D:

I submitted a query for "Unjoined" to Rebel Tales. I'm planning on submitting "Control" to Realms of Fantasy next time I go out. (It's snowing now. Yeah, little early for that. Craziness.) And I found a historical fiction magazine to submit "Death in Theatre" to and did that as well. I wish all submissions could be electronic now.

I need to type up a resume for Tracy and sign up for the middle school Praxis II exams for math and language arts. Deadline for both is today. So... I guess I'll work on that next, and then possibly revise Unjoined. And then... I'm considering revisiting the dead twin realistic story I got two pages into a while back... or maybe working on The Evil Realm... or something.

ETA: Done with the essentials mentioned above. Off to shovel the driveway... assuming I can find a snow shovel... yay exercise?

semester end, holidays approaching!

I kicked the Praxis II's ass. 198 out of 200 on Content Knowledge (Recognition of Excellence notation on that one) and 172 out of 200 on Content Exercises (only needed 150 to pass). I'm done with all my semester work, except I need to send Tracy a resume, and now that I know for sure that I passed the Praxis I need to sign up for the January Middle School Math and Middle School Language Arts versions of the test so I can be certified there too.

I already know I have an A in Reading Methods. I need one more A (assuming the rest are Bs and there are no Cs to worry about) to maintain my 3.2 for my partial scholarship. Now, I've had no trouble maintaining at least a 3.2 so far; in fact, I've made Dean's List every semester but my first. But I slacked a lot this year, so we'll see.

SynTru is taking off again now that I've put it into the loving, dedicated hands of Assirra and Zap. I'm still nosing around quite a bit, but officially my only duty is running the Ezine, which I'm hoping to get out by the last day of January. I reactivated my portfolio on Red Carpet & Rebellion and entered a challenge. I'm hoping I can attract more people to check out SynTru that way; I have the ad banner for the site in my signature.

Ummers. Christmas is coming up and I haven't bought any presents. Well, except the one Danny and I split for his mom. I'm not sure how I'm doing on money since I haven't paid rent for this month yet. I have the money sitting in my wallet, though.

life may be uninterrupted...

...but my updates are.

The aftermath of the me-Danny-Morgan thing. It's really over this time. No. Really.Collapse )

Erm, I gave up on NaNo. With the stress of conflict with Danny and school put together, it just wasn't doable this month. Or at least... I didn't have the energy. I have a lot of stuff due this week. In math, the second part of the portfolio. The science lesson apparently got moved back, so maybe not that. In classroom management, I have stuff due and overdue; of the three assignments, I can probably get two done without going back to my internship first. In reading, a book club reflection on a book I haven't read yet and won't get until later this week, so I'll be asking for an extension probably. In language arts, two case reports and my mini lesson report. Which I forgot to have my mentor fill out the rubric for. Damn. Guess that portion will be late.

Blah. Anyway. Life.

riddle me this

It's not just me right?

It's weird that my boyfriend is actively looking for a texting phone to buy a female coworker because she complained that it's hard to text on her phone.

Right?

On the one hand I feel like I'm mildly more paranoid than I ought to be after the Morgan thing. On the other hand, I do think I have that right, at least if it's something genuinely... not typical for one guy with a girlfriend to do for another girl (who does happen to have a boyfriend, not that it really matters in this situation).

ETA: He said he was joking. Why are his jokes never funny?

meh.

I don't really want to talk about it just yet.

But suffice to say, I'm feeling more normal, and even though our last conversation didn't go super well on a technical level, it still left me feeling almost inexplicably better about him really wanting me as opposed to logicking himself into it. Which was really the hardest part.

I'm not so scared anymore. This seems much more manageable now.

ETACollapse )